Have fun with your kids

It snowed here Wednesday.  For some of you, your reaction might be, “Yeah, so what.”  For others, you might think, “Yippee!” Still more of you might be basking in the warm sunshine and swimming in a pool.  I know my readers are from all over the world, so I have no clue what your weather might be.

 My question is… what activities are you doing with your children?

 Here, where it snowed big, fluffy, wet, snowman making weather, I saw many adults out playing with their children.  While others were not.  Of course, there are a number of reasons people may have stayed inside with the kids.

• Someone was ill

• They aren’t physically capable to participate in outdoor activities

• There are very young (like newborn) and it was too cold

 Unfortunately, some were not outside because either the child and or parent didn’t want to go out, or the parent was too busy.

 I would suggest those last reasons are not good reasons.  Almost everyone needs fresh air and exercise daily, if they can manage it.  In the winter, if you’re not inside because of the snow, you could be inside because of the cold.  BUT, a big, fluffy, wet, snowman making day is the perfect opportunity to get outside, get some fresh air and exercise, and do something FUN with your kids!

 It’s all too easy to let kids watch TV, play video games, play with their friends, or play by themselves.  It’s a little more difficult, for some, to find the time to do an activity with their child.  Yet, it’s so important to make that time.  Kids need to have fun with their parents.  Yes, you are their parent, not their friend.  I know that, but kids need to feel that their parents not only love them, but like them enough to spend time with them.

 Take every opportunity to connect with your children.  If that means getting outside to build a snowman, do it.  It could mean sitting around the table playing a board game, or card game together.  I would suggest a mixture of indoor and outdoor activities is best.  That way you are engaging both physical and mental strengths.

 Trust me, your kids want to do fun things with you.  Have fun with your kids.

*Pam Horton is a certified Parenting Coach in the Raleigh area.

Black Panther

What ever could I be talking about?  It could be…

·         the animal.  According to Wikipedia: A black panther is the melanistic color variant of any big cat species. Black panthers in Asia and Africa are leopards (Panthera pardus), and those in the Americas are black jaguars (Panthera onca).

·         the gang (or “party” as they are now called). Wikipedia has an extremely long explanation of this.  It starts with “The Black Panther Party or the BPP (originally the Black Panther Party for Self-Defense) was a revolutionary socialist organization founded by Bobby Seale and Huey Newton in October 1966. The party was active in the United States from 1966 until 1982.”

·         The Marvel Comics movie. Wikipedia has an extremely long explanation of this as well. It starts with “Not to be confused with The Black Panther (1921 film) or The Black Panther (1977 film).   Black Panther is an upcoming American superhero film based on the Marvel Comics character of the same name. Produced by Marvel Studios and distributed by Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures, it is intended to be the eighteenth film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.” And goes on to say, “After the events of Captain America: Civil War, King T’Challa returns home to Wakanda. But when two enemies conspire to bring down the kingdom, T’Challa must team up, as the Black Panther, with CIA agent Everett K. Ross and members of the Dora Milaje—Wakanda's special forces—to prevent a world war.”

So, which one am I going to write about today?  You don’t know, do you?  There is absolutely no way to tell, based on the title, what my topic will be for this blog.

How dare you assume that I am promoting the actions of the BPP!  I’m not even promoting the movie, or the rapper who performed at the College Championship half time show.  See, even I know so little about him that I will have to look up his name… Kendrick Lamar.

To be honest, I didn’t watch the 1/2time show.  I went to bed. So, I can’t speak to how good, or bad, the show was, but I was appalled by the “hate talk” I saw coming from some of my Facebook friends the next morning.

People who assumed the mentions of Black Panther were about the BPP and just “went off” on “How could the SEC allow that man to promote the BPP?”  Wow.  Just Wow.  They had no idea what they were talking about.  I was very pleased when another friend, who had watched the show, corrected them. Politely, of course. 

It is so sad when people jump to conclusions, especially the wrong conclusions.  THINK people!  Do your research before you speak out, for or against anything or anyone.  This is the kind of behavior that perpetuates the tension in the country.  STOP it.

By the way, in case you were wondering… this blog is about …     

Isn’t she beautiful?  Dangerous, but beautiful. 

Assumptions can be just as dangerous.  Just sayin’.

                          

I didn’t buy milk and bread

I did my regular grocery shopping on Wednesday, before the snow flew, and the store was jam packed with people buying bread and milk.  We don’t drink milk and I didn’t need bread, so I didn’t buy milk and bread.  Good thing, as the supply was basically depleted.

Currently, living in the Southeast, we are getting “hit” with snowstorm Grayson.  Here in the Raleigh area we got 1-2 inches and the first week of students going back to school has seen a delay, an early dismissal, and two days off. I know, to those up north, we overreact, but we don’t get snow, ice, and bitter cold very often.  Jim said the news reported it is the first time in 100 years where there have been seven days in a row with highs only in the 30s.

Ah, but let’s get back to the milk and bread.  I got to wondering WHY people rush out to by milk and bread at the slightest mention of a possible snowstorm.  I did quite a bit of research on the internet.  Guess, what?  I still don’t know!

I read a lot of articles and they all pretty much said the same thing, even referencing each other. Here’s what I found for “theories”…

·         There was a major storm in 1950, in Pittsburgh, that left people without milk and bread.

·         There was a major snow storm in 1978, New England, that left people stuck at home for weeks.  Although, I lived in Vermont at that time and don’t recall this.

·         People feel the need to be prepared for the long haul and need to buy something.

·         People purchase perishable products because it offers hope that the unpleasantness will be temporary.

·         If people were to buy water, canned goods, and batteries, it would imply a major disaster is coming.

·         It’s what you do.

Most of these seem to be pretty silly reasons to me.  I suppose I understand the need to feel prepared, but for me that would be water, canned goods, and batteries.  I actually sent Jim a text message while I was at the store that said,

And, No…I didn’t buy milk and bread.

*Pam Horton is a Certified Stress Management Coach, in the Raleigh area.

People Watching

Sitting in an airport after visiting my parents in Florida.  I must admit, it was tough to leave the beautiful sunshine at the beach.  I told my dad, “I could do this all day,” as we were walking the beach one last time before heading to the airport

 When I’m walking the beach, I am not looking at people.  In fact, the less people the better.  I enjoy the warm breeze, the sound of the waves, looking out at the ocean, and letting my mind wander.

 Here, at the airport, waiting for almost two hours to board, the more people the better.  They give me something to look at, and that can be quite entertaining.  There are as many different “types” of people as you can imagine.  Each one has a story. 

 The styles of dress are all over the place.  I wonder why people dress the way they do to travel.  Some of the ladies look very fancy.  Me, I want to be comfortable when I travel.  Of course, no one is going to turn their head to look at me as I walk by, and that’s fine with me.

 Body types are also across the board from fit to flabby.  I wonder how people got to be the way they are.  Is it genetics, or a choice they are making?  Are they happy with how they look (or more importantly with their level of health)?  Me, I’ve been fighting bronchitis for a couple months now and not exercising at all.  I can see, and feel, the difference and have a plan to get back on track in the new year.

 The looks are people’s faces are all pretty similar.  Traveling tends to not be a lot of fun.  Not too many people are smiling.  I get it, I’m not a fan of traveling either.  When someone finally invents teleportation I will be one of the first people to give it a try.  I love being places, it’s “the going” I don’t enjoy so much.

 I wonder if the people are not smiling because they are traveling, or is it because they don’t have much to smile about.  Maybe they are unhappy people with an unpleasant outlook on life.  I sure hope not.

 2017 is about to come to an end.  Monday is a brand new year.  A perfect opportunity to make a fresh start.  If you are unhappy with the way you look, or feel, or your level of fitness and health, this is a great time to start to make a change.  If you realize your outlook on life does not have you smiling, this is a perfect time to do something about it.  Of course, you can make a change at any time in your life, but often people want a “marker” as their starting point. 

 Is this your time?  When people are watching you in an airport, are they seeing the best you?  I hope so.  If not… it’s time to make the decision to change.  You can do it.

*Pam Horton is a Board Certified Advanced Christian Life Coach, in the Raleigh area.*

Did Mary Know?

This time of year causes people to remember times past and recall favorite things.  Do you have a family tradition at this time of year?  What is your favorite holiday memory?  Name your favorite holiday song!  I have a couple that I like but my all-time favorite Christmas song is, Mary Did You Know.

How difficult it must have been for Mary to watch her first born child suffer such a horrible death.  And yet, she did not try to intervene. Why was that?  Did she know that her son was THE SON, the Son of Man, the Son of God?  Scholars write that she did not know during His upbringing or He would not have been able to live a “human” life.  However, she came to believe it, much as we do today.

Still, He was her first born child. She let Him die, right before her eyes.  Oh, how difficult this must have been, to let this happen to your child for the greater good of mankind.  Mary had to believe that he would rise again, that all believers would have eternal life in heaven, and that she would see her son again one day.  Her great faith must have been what allowed her to stand by and watch Jesus be crucified. 

Do you have such faith?

Ah, but I will get off my soapbox now (but never off my Rock).  Yes, I am a Christian.  No, I will not be in your face about it, but I’m also not going to hide it.  If you would like to talk with me about this further, give me a call – grin.

Have a wonderful week, my friends.  Keep that happy holiday spirit.  Don’t let those ol’ humbug grinches get ya down.

*Pam Horton is a Certified Christian Life Coach in the Raleigh area.*

Christmas Music

Have you noticed that some radio stations play non-stop Christmas music from the day after Thanksgiving through the end of Christmas day? Some of you may think this is fantastic. I like Christmas songs, but round the clock for a month gets to be a little much for me.

I happen to find a couple Christmas songs to be very sad, and I don’t like to be sad. I will turn off “The Christmas Shoes”, “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” and “There’s No Place Like Home For The Holidays” in a heartbeat. I suppose it’s because I know, too often, people are not able to be home for Christmas (i.e., military families, families of divorce, families with a loved one recently deceased) and it makes me sad.

I did hear a song on the radio that I really take to heart each year, and I’m sure you can relate. The chorus of “Grown up Christmas List” is so true, probably for many of us.

No more lives torn apart,
Then wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
And every one would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end
This is my grown-up Christmas list.

Some of the verses ring especially true, too.

·         Not for myself, but for a world in need:

Some people reach this realization, but for many, we are well into adulthood before we realize that it isn’t all about us and there is, indeed, a big world around us full of people with greater needs than our wants.

·         That packages and bows can never heal a hurting human soul.

A human gift cannot heal the soul (only the gift of God’s grace can do that).  Letting someone know that you care about them, and value them is one way we can help others heal.

·         Maybe only in our blind belief can we ever find the truth!

In John 18:37 Jesus says “I was born and came into the world to testify to the truth.” This verse gets a hardy “AMEN!”  

Christmas is about the birth of Jesus Christ.  Children love the Christmas story, but many of them also love the gifts that “Santa” brings.  Let’s face it, most people enjoy receiving gifts, at any time of the year.  As adults, though, we need to come to a deeper understanding of the world around us, and our purpose in it.  This song is an excellent reminder of that.  Give it a listen…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8lXkCfvAHJs

(Songwriters: FOSTER, DAVID / THOMPSON, LINDA N) 

*Pam Horton is a Board Certified Advanced Christian Life Coach, in the Raleigh area.*

Lakawanna

Pennsylvania has some very strange town names. When we used to travel through PA, one of the town we passed was Lackawanna. (I spelled it incorrectly on purpose, I know nothing about the town and don’t mean any offense to those who live there.) We often passed the sign for Lackawanna College. We would tease our boys that it sounded like the perfect college for them, as they weren’t particularly motivated students. 

The other day, I had a “day off” in the middle of the week. I had an evening meeting, but otherwise an open schedule day. The phrase “I don’t want to adult today” went through my head and it occurred to me that I was dealing with a “lakawanna.” I just didn’t feel like doing any of the things on my to-do list. In fact, I didn’t feel like doing anything at all. Have you ever had a day like that?

I happened to have a very long to-do list. That may have contributed to my “lakawanna” attitude. It was a day off for me, and yet it was full of things that needed to be done. Or did they?

I examined my list. There were a couple must do’s on it, but the rest were really should do’s. Time to prioritize.

I should have saved my list to share exactly what I chose not to do that day, just to prove that all things are not must do’s. I know for a fact I didn’t print out our family Christmas newsletter, because I still haven’t done it. I am going to do that tomorrow. Yes, by then it will be a must do and at the top of the list, right after grocery shopping.

So, when you find yourself with a long to-do list and a “lakawanna,” remember that most likely all those things don’t have to get done that day, and prioritize. 

*Note: if they really DO have to get done that day, have a cuppa coffee and get started! Maybe listen to some rockin’ upbeat music to get you motivated to get some work done. Grin.

*Pam Horton is a Certified Stress Management Coach, in the Raleigh area.*